Red Polished Toenails and Unrequited Love
The things you said to me fifteen days ago. The nearly condescending things:
“I just can’t picture it—us together… it’s been what… FIVE years?”
(But you can picture me naked, can’t you. I am still wearing the same fire engine red toenail polish I was wearing the last time I was with you. Two months ago.)
“I can’t imagine you coming here to live. I mean, I would love having you in town, but I just can’t imagine it.”
“If you came here, we’d have to take it slow.”
“I have never met someone I was as impressed with as I am with you.”
“I obviously am still very attracted to you.”
“You know I’m pretty popular and well-liked in this town and know a lot of people, right? I mean, I could probably have my pick of dates, but I just don’t want to date anyone.”
“She was here last weekend and she said a lot of the things that you are saying now. And I think I could get her back if I wanted to.”
(Maybe the saddest thing in the world is loving someone who used to love you.)
“B, it’s not a competition between you and her.”
“I am so confused.”
I responded, “Yes, it’s pretty tough when two people adore you at the same time.”
To which you said, “I guess you would know.”
“B, you KNOW I CARE about you. “
(So THIS is what it feels like. Unrequited love.)
-B
i make no apologies 
